I am a mess.
Not just today. Most days, actually.
I may look like I have it together… like I’m dealing with my insecurities in a healthy way and have made peace with all the imperfections that make me up.
But really… because I want to be honest with you… I’m just messy.
There are so many messy thoughts in my mind and messy feelings in my heart that I don’t really share. I have so much inner-dialogue about the importance of keeping the crazy locked inside so it doesn’t bleed into the world.
Because what if you don’t like me when you know how much I struggle?
Don’t we all feel that way? –>What would others think if they really knew?
But I wonder… how many people will it free to just BE if they did know? I mean, how refreshing to know we’re not alone in our mess — that it’s not just us.
I stood in my room today and saw the perfect visual for my life right now. And since you may be a visual learner too… I snapped a few pics.
Yes… this is my closet with clothes all over the floor. I don’t know whether they are clean or dirty. Awesome.
This is our bed that will probably stay unmade until 5 minutes before Wayne gets home. Just like usual.
This is the ministry storage section of my room that’s also the dumping ground for “stuff.” And yes, that’s a sword on my wall. I like reminders that I am a warrior for the Kingdom.
And this is my side of the bed where clothes collect. I may or may not wear them multiple days in a row.
This is me. This is my life. This is real.
So here’s what I want to say…
It’s okay that you don’t have it all together. In fact, it’s terribly refreshing to know we don’t have to hide behind the facade of “my life is perfect.”
And I know some days it takes all you have to put on a brave face and walk into the world, but you have to. You can’t use your messy as an excuse to be lazy. Your messy can’t be the reason you stay stagnant and stuck. And friend, messy doesn’t give you a free-pass to give up.
Even more… messy doesn’t disqualify you from doing great things (big or small) for the Kingdom.
Because in His amazingness, God finds a way to use that mess by turning it into your message for the world.
Truth is, I want to be the kind of person that makes you feel safe in your messy. And I want to know it’s safe to share my messy with you too.
So let’s do this together.
You be real with me… and I’ll be real with you.
I like honesty. I admire transparency. And I crave authenticity.
And I think perfectionism is over-rated… unattainable… and stupid. Being fake takes too much time and energy, and it closes us off from those we’re here to love and encourage.
So let’s embrace messy… stumbles, fumbles, and all.
And when one of us falls or fails… and when we’re beating ourselves up for bad choices, bad decisions and bad situations… let’s be willing to come here broken and know we will still be loved.
Because I do love you, sweet sister. Even in your messy…