This Christmas break was one of the hardest on record for me. It’s been an emotional tornado and rather than come out of it rested… I am weary.
That’s not how it normally is.
I love the holidays. My inner-child comes alive, and I thrive with all the sights, smells and sounds of Christmas. I love having the kids out of school and planning fun vacation days with them. My husband takes time off and we get to hang out as a family.
Most of the time, I walk into January full of energy and excitement for the new year.
… But this time it was different.
All the traditional family activities surrounding Christmas weren’t as appealing to my kids as they’ve been in the past.
No one wanted to go look at Christmas lights.
They quickly lost interest in cookie decorating.
We watched very few holiday shows.
It was a BIG bummer for me.
I know, I know… they are growing up and things change. I get that. I like that. I love who my kids are becoming. But it was hard to let go of the past, and I mourned the loss of how things used to be at Christmas.
Add to that hormones.
Lots of hormones.
How do you navigate such extreme and irrational fluctuations in your kids with grace and patience?
Lord, help me.
Parenting is hard.
Honestly, I never expected it to be as challenging and hands-on as it actually is. I’m not sure why my expectations were so different from my reality. I guess no one can fully prepare you for being mom… because every child is unique and special… and every mom comes with her own baggage.
Motherhood isn’t a one-size-fits-all role.
Our kids don’t come with instructions.
What works for one child, doesn’t work at all for another.
And while I love being a mom, sometimes it just knocks me to my knees. My home goes from calm to chaos in a moment’s notice. New challenges come flying at me from every direction.
Listen… Motherhood ain’t for sissies.
And in the thick of it… when I’m certain things cannot get worse… God often reveals something about me… to me.
- He reveals a shortcoming or a destructive thought-pattern.
- My children push buttons I never knew were there, and God makes me acutely aware of them.
- I see something in my kids that drives me nuts, and then He gently reminds me it’s… generational.
Aka: Baggage. Bleh…
Are you tracking with me, sister? I bet you know exactly what I am talking about. It’s the journey of being a mom.
You see… so often we find ourselves:
Mourning the loss of how things used to be…
Dealing with our kid’s wack-a-doo hormones…
And staring at our own nasty, fleshy issues…
Girls… We need Jesus.
We need to know that He is our IDENTITY.
As moms… as women… we need to know who we are and Whose we are.
Because from our IDENTITY… our words and actions flow.
It’s from that place our self-esteem anchors.
And unless we let Him fill us, direct us, motivate us, calm us, affirm us, and give us His peace… we are going to allow our role as MOM to pull us under. Either that or we will disengage from parenting, letting our kids figure life out themselves.
Sisters… neither is a good option.
What if instead…
we decided to believe that we ARE who God says we are?
we believed God called us into the role of MOM on purpose?
we believed He’ll EQUIP us to be the best mom for our kids?
Sisters… God created YOU to be mom to YOUR kids.
- He knows your shortcomings.
- He knows your tendencies.
- He knows your failures.
- He knows your potential.
And He chose you anyway… stumbles, fumbles and all.
But God also knows that parenting is best done with your eyes on Him.
When we place our IDENTITY in Jesus… when we know who we are and Whose we are… we can do all things through Him. Even motherhood.
We can recharge when we’re weary.
We can accept the changes in our kids.
We can find grace for hormones.
We can work through our own issues.
But we need Jesus to do it.
“Father, thank You for assigning me the role of mom to these kids. Help me see them as blessings, even when they make me crazy. Would You secure my identity in You, so it anchors how I parent? Would You help me know who I am and Whose I am, Lord? Help me remember You are my strength, my shield, and my strong tower when motherhood threatens to knock me down. Help me stay engaged and intentional. Help me show these kids who You are by reflecting You in all I do. Help me navigate different seasons in my children’s lives, and know when to give grace and when to give guidance. Heal my woundings that get triggered as I parent. I cannot do this job without You, God. I need You. In Jesus’ name… Amen.”
©2013 Carey Scott
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