Sara’s been dealing with some frustrating friend issues, and Sam has been struggling in a few other areas. Now I know this is normal. We all have challenges and tumultuous waters to navigate in life.
But it’s really been getting to me lately.
I’ve felt a bit over-whelmed and under-qualified as a mom.
It’s taken a lot of brain-power (which is already running on low), and has preoccupied my thoughts.
But oddly, my husband hasn’t experienced the same.
Their struggles weren’t affecting him the same way they were affecting me.
Now Wayne is a great man, amazing husband, doting father, and hears the voice of God in his life. He’s involved and engaged in our family. He is aware of it all… but the struggles Sam and Sara are facing aren’t rockin’ him.
As we were walking, I was dissecting each issue the kids were facing like only women can do. I was ruminating about how to best handle it… how I did handle it… and if I should have handled it differently.
My poor man was a captive audience for my manic-madness for the next mile. He was essentially – trapped.
And then he said to me, “Why don’t you ask God what’s going on… and why this is so all-encompassing for you?”
Wow… that was a brilliant idea! Duh! Why didn’t I think of that?
… Sometimes I’m a little slow on the uptake.
So I did ask… I have asked.
And God recently revealed something very interesting.
Interesting in an “annoying” way.
He uncovered the reality that my kid’s struggles are triggering me… because they are also my struggles.
It’s like looking into a mirror.
God has showed me what’s been tripping me up… and why.
– I obsess when my children wrestle with friendships because they can be tricky for me, too. It’s been an area of great wounding.
– I obsess with their lack of self-confidence because it’s also an area of struggle for me at times. I battle feelings of worthlessness.
– I obsess when they feel left-out, because rejection is my hot-button as well. And I’m learning (often painfully) to only seek His approval.
Back up the bus! You mean it’s about me… again. Ugh.
… I’m so over myself.
But God isn’t. As a matter of fact, He is using everything in my life as a tool to heal me right up… even down to the challenges my kid’s are facing.
Because you see… I’m a captive audience.
Just as my husband was trapped on our walk and had no choice but to listen to my craziness, I have no choice but to walk through these struggles with my kids.
I take my role as mom very seriously. I love these little critters that God has given me, and I want to see them succeed and thrive.
I don’t want them to be my age struggling with these same things.
Anyone tracking with me??
And so because I am willing to walk these rocky paths with my kids… seeking God’s wisdom for their situations… counseling them to love and forgive others… speaking their value and worth… reminding them how much they matter…
… I’m being healed through it.
Why? Because the words of wisdom I am sharing with my kids as they work through their struggles is the same antidote I need to heal from my own.
He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds [curing their pains and their sorrows]. (Psalm 147:3)
God is using the struggles my children are facing to heal my own brokenness… my wounding… my pain… my sorrow.
– As I counsel them… God is counseling me.
– As I encourage them… He encourages me.
– As I advise them… God advises me.
– As I heal their hearts… He heals mine.
Only God can do that.
Where is He working like this in your life?
©2013 Carey Scott