SURRENDERED WIFE: The New Normal

This journey has been a wild ride… yes?

I’ve had days where I wanted to throw in the towel and go back to the easy way of how things have always been.  I’ve longed for my way.  I have wanted to take over so situations would be handled… right.

I’ve gone through every emotion known to (wo)man.

There have been times I was so mad I could’ve spit.  Other times I’ve cried in frustration.  And others where I’ve laughed when a change I made actually… worked.

My husband has been amazing one day and less-than-amazing the next.

I have been challenged to try things so foreign to me that I eventually followed in blind faith, hoping it would work.

We’ve had moments where Wayne has stopped in his tracks and looked at me in confusion when I told him I didn’t have an opinion… or we could do it his way.

But regardless of the ups and downs… regardless of the crunchy times… my journey to surrender has worked miracles in my marriage.

Are things perfect?  Nope.

Do I always do it right?  Not a chance.

Is my marriage problem-free?  HA!

Am I always excited to step back so he can step forward?  LOL.

But I am so grateful to have crossed paths with The Surrendered Wife book, because it has helped me begin to align my role with God’s design.

It’s helped clearly define the differences between worldly submission and Godly surrender.  They are worlds apart.

I wish we could sit together over coffee and share our experiences.   I wonder…

• Did you face similar struggles and responses? 
• Why did you decided to walk this journey with me?
• Has your marriage improved?
• Does your husband have more confidence?
• Is he more engaged?
• Do you feel less overwhelmed?
• Have you found freedom from not having to do it all?

My biggest hope is you’ve discovered that surrendering to your husband … as God intended … is a good thing.

If you are like me, your heart has long yearned for a better marriage.  And this journey has opened your eyes to ways you can help make that desire a reality.

To no surprise, God keeps providing me with ample opportunities to fully embrace the surrendering concept.

For the past few months, we’ve been collecting bids and estimates for some home renovations.  Our house is almost 15 years old and looks it.  Rather than update with “fun” renovations, we are doing the necessary ones instead.

To be honest, I’m a little anxious.

I’m a bargain-hunting, coupon-using, cheapest-way-to-do-it kind of girl.  But I’m coming to realize there are some processes that you shouldn’t skimp on.

“You get what you pay for” is my husband’s mantra.

I’ve had to apply generous amounts of that proverbial duct tape to keep my mouth shut.  And rather than argue with, question or stress out, I’m making a deliberate choice to just trust him.

In reality, he is a smart man capable of making good choices.  And I’ve learned that my ways are not always the best ways.  I know these things… now.

And when that inner control-freak threatens to erupt, I pray this quick prayer… out loud.

“Lord, I trust Your Holy Spirit’s voice in my husband.”

It’s become a regular saying.

So, when anxiety starts to invade…

when I begin to worry about money…

when I think he’s making the wrong choices…

I am intentional in stepping out of the way so he can lead.

It’s not my normal response… yet.

But it will be.

I am committed to becoming a card-carrying surrendered wife, because I like “us” better when we are in the roles God designed for marriage.

I’m realizing there is great freedom in letting Wayne and God figure it out.  And to my amazement, they don’t need my unsolicited input or advice.

They are doing just fine.

Yes… this is good.

My husband is more confident and choosing to lead.

I am softer and more willing to release control.

Our marriage is more in alignment with God’s design.

And yours can be, too.

†††

©2013 Carey Scott

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Concept taken from The Surrendered Wife