I’m going to be very transparent in this post…
God is working me over with regard to who I let define my value and worth as a person. My need for approval from others is so ingrained in me… and the realization of it is blowing me away. It’s deep down in the marrow in my bones.
I hate it!
There are seasons in my life where I have a really good perspective on who I am and whose I am. I find I can let things roll off my back easier. Hurtful comments or actions are not as penetrating. I listen and internalize who God tells me I am.
In those times, I feel His strength coursing through my veins.
But in those other seasons when I seem to allow everyone else to define me, I find myself weak and depressed. My outlook is bleak. My perspective is skewed. I begin to believe the reviews. Sometimes I catch my actions reflecting them as well.
God is trying to heal that in me.
You know how I know? Because everywhere I turn these days, it is staring me in the face. I feel like saying “thank you” and “darn it” at the same time.
He has given me so many opportunities to work on it in the past year. I wonder when it will really, honestly set in. I’m not looking for a seasonal cure, but rather a lifetime freedom. So is God.
He… loves… me… that… much.
What is God working out in your life? What issue(s) keeps presenting itself over and over again? It might be packaged differently each time, but once you uncover it… you see it for what it is. Is it:
- Pride
- Jealously
- Selfishness
- Priorities
- Addiction
… or maybe something else. Regardless, pray for the spiritual eyes and ears to see what God sees in your life. Be thankful He cares enough to want us freed from whatever stronghold we are struggling with.
Confess it.
Dig in scripture to find more about it. Ask how if you don’t know where to start. Pray for God to release you from it! Talk to someone. Get Godly advice. Find an accountability partner. Do something.
But rest knowing we are a work-in-progress until we are in heaven. No one will be perfected here on earth. Not one person. But God will provide a way for that stronghold to loosen its grip.
I’m confident I will get a handle on my issue of value and worth. My prayer is that I will begin to consistently find my value in the fact that “since I am God’s idea… I am a good idea” (a tweet from Max Lucado). I trust God to work it out.
God delivers.
Great post Carey!
We truly are a “work in progress” till the grave!
Carey, I have this same issue – approval. I really want everybody to like me, but when they don’t then I totally cannot accept it and try harder, which usually digs me into a bigger hole. In January, Wereje Benson told me this, “Grow beyond (above) criticism.” Later I found this in the Bible. So even though it is very difficult to do, we have to grow beyond all the negatives that we receive. You know, if we were doing nothing, then there would be nothing to criticize. Easy to say, hard to do. This is one of my biggest struggles.