The Desire to be… Seen

She kept looking over at me, and I began to feel pressure to keep my eyes trained on her instead of concentrating on my own agenda.

I’d actually brought a book to read while she was at volleyball practice… something I had to read for a project… but I soon discovered this hour was going to be fruitless.

At least for my purposes.

But for my 9-year-old daughter, Sara… these 60 minutes would produce much fruit.

After each play, she would glance over… looking for my approval.

When she messed up… she wanted my “you can do it” hand-clap and eye-wink.

When she felt insecure with her skills… she needed me to smile bigger in support.

And so I did.

I put my book down and watched my daughter participate in her first volleyball practice of the season.

I smiled.  I waved.  I never looked away.

And I realized what she needed was to … be seen.

It feels good to be noticed, doesn’t it?

As women, we have a deep need for others to see us… stumbles, fumbles and all.

You know why?

Because it speaks to our sense of value.  We.  Feel.  Important.

It affirms that what we do… and who we are… and what we think… and how we feel… matters.

It’s why we worry about how we look as we leave the house.

It’s why we crave thank you notes when we help others.

It’s why we boast about a hard-earned accomplishment or a beaten obstacle.

It’s why we love to have coffee with our friends.

It’s why our hearts soar when our husbands spend time asking about our day.

It’s why we go to a counselor or life coach.

When others really “see” us, we come alive.

The truth is that…

We want to know that we’re good moms… loving wives… trustworthy friends… and valuable employees.

We need to know the advice we give… the life experiences we’ve lived… the challenges we’ve overcome… and the perspective we hold makes a difference.

We want our feelings to matter… our ideas to be heard… our hearts to be understood.

And at the core, this isn’t necessarily a self-centered desire.  When done right, it’s actually healthy.  We all have the innate desire to be loved and valued by our friends and family.

But why do we only look to the world for these measures of value?

God tells us in Psalm 139:1-3 that He sees us, too.

O Lord, you have examined me, and you know me. 

You alone know when I sit down and when I get up. 

You read my thoughts from far away. 

You watch me when I travel and when I rest. 

You are familiar with all my ways.

This passage reminds us that God:

• Studies us
• Understands us
• Knows things about us others cannot
• Reads our thoughts
• Keeps watch over us at all times
• Knows our habits and hang-ups

What’s left?

What’s missing?

Nothing.  Because of God, we are fully KNOWN.

You see, our Creator built that desire into our DNA.  And from the beginning of time, He planned to meet it… knowing no one or nothing else could.

So when you begin to think that you don’t matter… or that you’re not seen… or that you hold no importance in the world… remember God.

He sees you, values you and loves you.

And to prove it, He sent His only Son to die so nothing would separate you from Him.

So friends… when you are feeling invisible, look up to your Heavenly Father.

His eyes are trained on you.

♥

REALITY CHECK:  “God sees us with the eyes of a Father. He sees our defects, errors and blemishes. But He also sees our value.” (Max Lucado)

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© 2012 careyscotttalks.com

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