When You Can’t Let it Go

I exploded. It had been a long time since I’d felt that kind of anger.

Within moments of my husband’s comment, I was ready to bite though a nail. My face grew hot as it flushed with rage. I was ready to rumble!

… It seems silly now, actually.

Looking back, the words he spoke weren’t horrible. Could he have chosen a better sentence to share with me? Yes. But did his offense warrant my reaction? No.

And for a week – yes an entire week – I was absolutely furious with Wayne.

He apologized several times. I heard him.

He tried to make-nice by bringing me a frappuccino.  Usually a slam dunk, but not this time.

He offered to talk it out with me. I wasn’t interested.

I. Was. Just. Seething.

So I started asking God what the real issue was. I knew my reaction to his words was way bigger than it should have been… than it usually is. And when I still couldn’t make sense of it, I pressed in deeper with God.

As a matter of fact, I prayed in earnest for 4 days before He began to speak a hard truth into my heart.

He said, “This isn’t about what Wayne said. This is about unfinished work in you.”

Gulp.

Me… again.

Ugh. Do you ever just get tired of having so many issues???

During that week, God began to expose deeper roots to some of my life-long struggles. But you know what I realized? These roots weren’t as deep as they used to be.

You see, God and I have been doing some work lately.

– We’ve been unearthing rocks that have laid deep in the soil of my life.

– The Master Gardener has been tenderly pulling up weeds that were threatening the fruit.

– He’s been shining more of His Son in some areas that needed light.

No doubt, I’ve had some things uncovered and plucked lately. I’ve had to give up control. Change my thinking. Blindly trust. Make hard decisions. Walk by faith.

God has done a good work in me.

I am different. I’m changed. He’s started some necessary work in me.

But now I realize there’s more to do.

Obviously.

My red-hot temper at Wayne’s comment was a red flag moment. And while it took me a few days to see the bigger picture…

… I see it now.

So I’m asking God…

“Complete Your good work in me, Lord. Make me more like Jesus in all I say and do. Help me overlook an offense and be quicker to forgive. Take away all that keeps me in bondage.”

Well I eventually let go of my anger. I had to. And God blessed my family with an amazing weekend together where we connected on a heart level. Oh it was good.

But my Master Gardener isn’t done with me yet.

And He’s not done with you, either.

Sister… What weed is God pulling in your life?

Where is He asking you to bloom in freedom?

Have no doubt. The Enemy is against this. He wants us to remain a slave.

He is working overtime to make us stay in those same old oppressive, destructive patterns that… strain relationships… cause anger, guilt and shame… and keep us from living authentic lives.

But Jesus wants us to be free.

Jesus said, “I tell you most solemnly that anyone who chooses a life of sin is trapped in a dead-end life and is, in fact, a slave. A slave is a transient, who can’t come and go at will. The Son, though, has an established position, the run of the house. So if the Son sets you free, you are free through and through. (John 8:34-36)

So… be… free.

REALITY CHECK: What keeps you from trusting the capable hands of the Master Gardener in your soil?

♥♥♥

©2013 Carey Scott

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