This is an except from Untangled…
My mantra used to be, “I love God, just not His people.”
Based on my past woundings, I was justified in closing my heart to others. It was just safer that way. But behind those words was fear that I wasn’t worth loving. It was easier on my already fragile self-esteem to close the door before it slammed in my face again. I couldn’t risk opening myself up to deep, intimate friendships because I’d been hurt so much in the past. And while my heart ached for community, I was deathly afraid of it.
Friendship was thought up by God, the giver of all delightful things. His plan is for us to live in a cooperative spirit. He commands us to love and serve one another. God expects us to journey through life together because His heart is for community.
In his book Life Together, Dietrich Bonhoeffer agreed.
“It is easily forgotten that the fellowship of Christian brethren is a gift of grace, a gift of the Kingdom of God that any day may be taken from us, that the time that still separates us from utter loneliness may be brief indeed. Therefore, let him who until now has had the privilege of living a common Christian life with other Christians praise God on his knees and declare: It is grace, nothing but grace, that we are allowed to live in community with Christian brethren.”
This quote is a great reminder that friends are God’s gift to us. They make us laugh when we’re down, counsel us when we’re confused, direct us when we’re lost, help us when we’re overwhelmed, and pray for us when we’re hurting. We can safely ask, “Does this make my butt look big” and know they will be honest.
… Friends will love us through bad haircuts, and understand the tears when we get them.
… They’ll listen for as long as we need to talk, and comfort us with, “Oh, honey.”
… They’ll cup our face in their sweet hands and remind us how wonderful we are when we feel defective.
… And they’re the ones who know exactly what’s on our mind with one glance from across the room.
Oh, girlfriends are priceless. And it’s so important that we understand that. Many women go through life without any deep friendships. They aren’t perfect, but they are a gift.
So yes, friendships are worth it. So very worth it.
What women do you consider precious in your life? What is it about them that rock your world? This week, let those friends know just how special they are.
And remember, you’re a gift to your friends, too.
Haven’t read Untangled yet? Purchase your signed copy HERE!
Heather says
Thank you for your post. I used to be the person who did not think friendship was worth it. I was scared and did not think I was worth liking. God has been working on changing that. I now have several good close friends who I can share with and who can share with me as well.